" Dianna said as she ran her hands up my arms and touched my shoulders looking into my eyes as if about to kiss me.I had to avert my eyes so as not to lie by just nodding or showing any assent to her thoughts. She knew me well enough to sense something."Dean! NO! Not last night, please don't tell me it's so!"I was silent for a few moments, not able to make eye contact with her."When I made the snide comment about a "goodbye boink" I hit the nail didn't I? How the fuck can I trust you or any man!" She said as she turned away from me on the sofa and put her head in her hands."Dianna, you'll have to trust me and believe me on this one. I had no commitment to you and you know that. This only helped me make the decision I made with you this morning. I don't expect you to understand and I only tell you now because I could never deceive you, or lie to you. It was a double edged dagger to tell you or lie to you. Please hear me out." I said to her without touching her.I was sure if I tried to. And I don’t intend to go that way. Not now. If ever. So we just continue to sit there in silence. After a while the first rain drops begin to fall. Only a few, but they are quite heavy. Immediately, this specific smell is reaching my nose. This special it-begins-to-rain-in-the-summer smell. It smells delicious. The few, fat drops hammer on the roof. They leave small craters in the sand. We are still quite shielded under the canopy. It gets noticeably darker, cooler and windier now. The sea gets quite rough and changes to a dark green color. With a little help from the gusty wind, several raindrops manage to reach us under the canopy. It causes neither Anna nor me to move or even say a single word. In its own way this is a perfect moment. We are just there. We just live. Nothing needs to be said or done.Finally Anna stands up. I look at her. I even look directly into her eyes. The eyes of a woman I thought I once knew. Overall, she looks incredibly sad. I wish I still had these kind.
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